Year Analysis

Yes, it's just now the 31st, but I don't know if I'm going to post any before the ball drops.

January

Talked about some names I've earned. Lost talent. My take on relationships. Quite possibly my favorite post of 2005. The post with my favorite comments.

February

Background on my friends. My grandmother passed away. The things I want and the things I like.

March

My thanks to Anh. A bad mood. Some flashbacks. The feeling of all feelings.

April

Why I'm nice. A calm before the storm.

May

The story of an accident from way back. A small BBQ with friends. Listed my passions.

June

My Harman/Kardon receiver blew up. Stupid librarian. Father's day with some praise. My 500th post. First mention on AOTS.

July

My first pinched nerve. When I wasn't being me. Why I don't go all out for anything.

August

Things that suck about the first day of school. The day before. The day after. The qualities that make me. First day of Fall 2005.

September

I helped the police. Saw a really hot scene on Nip/Tuck. Thought out loud for my first paper.

October

Want to go for a walk? My 600th post.

November

A serious article cracked me up. Funny quotes from The Ticket. Another rebirth. And its first real post. My take on the death penalty. A nice Thanksgiving. Things I look for or don't. And November in one list.

December

A great day. A dilemma with Christmas. My take on premarital sex.


Overall, a decent year. I can only hope 2006 will be better.

Answers #1

Before I do my year-in-review, I have 3 questions that I need to answer.

1. Religious reasons. I'm not sure what the answer is, but I know that we don't celebrate Christmas. Or any holiday. We observe something like Passover, but that's it. And really, I don't know why it is. I was born into it, and I stopped paying attention in church when I was 10 or so. I haven't been to church in nearly 5 years. Might be more. But my reason for not going to church is simply because I do not get along with most of the people there. I don't know how to describe it. While their idea of fun is going to a movie, I prefer going to a party with booze and 'other stuff.' While they drank root beer, I was bartending at family get-togethers. And while holding hands is the sign of a serious relationship, well, you get the idea.

Although, some of my friends that I still hang out with today were people I met through church. Well, Pat is the only one that comes to mind right now.

2. If you mean the girl I was into a year ago, I don't really know what's up with her. I haven't talked to her since May. Well, I did send her an e-card earlier this month to wish her luck during finals, but that's it. I decided to keep looking around, and I'm happy with that decision so far.

3. I honestly have no idea. I guess I'll go with the obvious but probably wrong 'a group of helicopters.'

Tomorrow's End

Pat came by again with his XBOX 360. Tons o' fun.

I don't know when, but I really want to see The Ringer. One line cracks me up...

"My name is 'Awesome,' and I can count to potato."

Maybe tomorrow or Saturday. I don't have anything else planned.

Speaking of plans, still no idea of when I want to go back to Austin. It looks like next Friday. I may coax my parents into leaving Thursday night. Eh, Friday morning could work too I guess. I do know that I'm getting my hair color put in Thursday afternoon. Going after a dark red. Might change my hairstyle too.

Either way. The year is almost finished. Great,

Where To Go

Yea, well, screw the questions.

I had my eyes checked this afternoon. Not much change. I also asked about contact lenses for when I play ball. I was hooked up with tons o' free stuff. I need to practice putting them in and taking them out, but it's nothing I can't learn in a few minutes.

Also went shopping. Bought some new jeans, two new shirts, and the Audioslave DVD. All in all, things went well.

I really like being home. Unfortunately, my mom has been sick for a week now. On the bright side, it means I've spent plenty of time with my parents. My dad has the next two days off, and my mom is calling in sick tomorrow. Don't know if there's any plans.

I'm so close to being done. I didn't realize it.

I've been staying up until 5AM lately. There's usually a good movie on around midnight. I watched The Girl Next Door last night. Elisha Cuthbert is sooo hot in that movie. And some of the characters are just hilarious. I watched The Graduate on the night before. Still one of my favorite movies.

Alright. I'm going to pass out for a while.

Just Ask

Eyes and emotions can only show you so much. You have to listen. It is the only way.

It's not about opening your eyes, or your heart. It's about understanding the situation. You have to understand yourself. I don't mean that you find out who you are. I mean that you have to accept who you are.

No class or organization is going to show me that deep down, I like cooking. I've already accepted it. I'm not going to find out that I'm quiet because words can only lead to trouble. I've accepted that as well. I don't have to find out who I am. I just have to accept everything.

Acceptance is important. Too important.

I know my strengths and weaknesses. I know my potential, and I know why I haven't lived up to it yet. I know what I offer, and I know what I take.

Still, I stay silent.

Either way, after looking back to exactly one year ago, I've decided to accept questions. 3 questions at a time, about anything. I will take questions until Thursday night. On Friday, I will answer all questions. On Saturday, I will do my "year in review."

So, get to thinking. Don't leave me disappointed.

A Day

Christmas was at my door. So I turned out all of the lights, muted the TV, and hid behind a couch. Just another day for me.

The Cowboys actually won, so that was a nice thing on Saturday. My dad missed all of the game because it started at noon and my dad doesn't get home until after 3PM. Still, he was quite happy.

Today was no big deal. I woke up at 1PM and did the usual morning stuff. I really did nothing after that though. Around 4PM or so, my Dad and I went to a nearby school to shoot the ball around. Felt good. It was probably 68 degrees or so. It's supposed to be warmer tomorrow. If it isn't to windy, I'm sure we'll do it again.

But the best thing about tomorrow is all of the sales. I want to get some more jeans and khakis. Oh, but the thing that sucks is everyone will be at the mall. I don't want to do that. Few people know I'm in town, and I would like to keep it that way. Then again, I did get a haircut, and I do look good...

I've been home for a week now. The only thing I miss about Austin right now is that I haven't seen my nephew in so long. I'm sure he's yelling my name everyday.

The year is almost over, which means it will be time to reflect soon. I remember what I did last year, and that seems like the plan so far. That makes me wonder about what I was doing exactly one year ago.

Bad idea.

Alright. I plan on waking up before noon tomorrow, so I'm going to sleep now.

Relax

Well, I upgraded my dad's computer. He has a new Nvidia video card and a Sony DVD-ROM drive. Pat helped me out with some of it. And he drank plenty o' beer.

Wow, that XBOX 360 is nice. Played Need For Speed: Most Wanted, Perfect Dark Zero, and Call of Duty 2. I have to say that I had the most fun with Need For Speed. My skills (hitting cars and signs) made the cops hate me. There's nothing I love more than starting a car chase.

Still, no alcohol has touched these lips.

But I did have my 2nd soda in the past 4 months.

I figured I would have been bored by now. There's not much for me to do around here. I sleep until 1, watch TV for a few hours, and then sit around some more. But it's exactly what I need. I have to relax as much as possible, which means I have to do as little as possible.

Speaking of which, I'm going to lay down and watch TV. Might be fun.

Thor's Day

Going to have plenty of fun.

Pat said he'll stop by with his XBOX 360 so I can check it out. Plus, my dad is off tomorrow, so there will be plenty of entertainment.

I talked my mom into buying some Egg Nog. Not crappy Schepp's Egg Nog. I'm talking Braum's. That's the good stuff. And today, we went to the liquor store. Picked up some rum, something for my dad, and some wine for my mom. I forgot what my dad got. I think it was some Canadian Whiskey, Seagram's perhaps. Don't know if I'll touch any, but maybe. Maybe.

Also did the haircut thing. Same ol' style. But I think that I'll change it whenever I leave. I'll have to put in some dark red highlights for sure. Don't know if I want to let my hair grow out or not. Eh, I have plenty of time to think about it.

Eh, that's all for now.

In Town

First, here's to a speedy recovery for J.

I've been in town for two nights, and I've been out two nights. Awesome. Just what I need.

Eurotrip is going to be on in 12 minutes. That's one of those movies where if it's on, it's good to watch. Would I go rent it? No. But if I need something to watch, it's not a bad choice.

Went to Hooter's. The waitress mentioned a boyfriend, which is a no-no. I still left a good tip though. I'm a good tipper. And the burger came out real nice. I forgot to say "medium-well," but oh well.

Tomorrow will be fun. I'm looking forward to two hours of Nip/Tuck. We finally find out who The Carver is. It's been a season-and-a-half in the making. Every fan has already guessed all of the main characters, so someone is going to be an obnoxious fool about it.

Ooh, and Boston Legal will be on too. And House! Man, I love Tuesdays.

I'm already looking forward to dinner tomorrow. Don't know what I'll eat, but I can't wait. Oh man, I just know I'm going to put on a few pounds while I'm home. Eh, that could be a good thing.

Some songs to listen to:

Nancy Sinatra - Bang Bang
Tool - Disposition
Al Green - Let's Stay Together
A Perfect Circle - Thomas

And with that, I head to bed.

Semester Finale

Wow. It's all done. Amazing.

But I'm not completely stress-free. I need to turn in my instrument. And I can't do that if I'm in Dallas. Totally screwed. I'll either have to come back early, or absorb the punishment. I'll probably come back early. Sometime after New Year's Day.

Once again, the cold wind brings back old memories. Times when I had patience, but not enough. Back when a certain person had little to no courage. Or once upon a time when my words got me whatever I wanted. Oh, that was quite a time.

I had a really weird dream. Someone I haven't seen in a long time, just appeared and instantly became part of my family. And as a friend. So weird. (Yes, female.)

I also had a dream of a room. A normal-sized room, but it was a shower. The entire room was a shower. Amazing.

OK, so I mentioned the past. So what? I don't care. I just discovered many interesting facts while typing this. Many. Here are a few:

• I saved a girl from a horrible future, even if it meant breaking her heart.
• A guy I hated in high school is still a terible person.
• And a guy we weren't too sure about isn't even sure about himself.

I'm almost done reminiscing about high school. It's been a long time, and I should be thinking about recent good times. In fact, when I was walking on campus earlier tonight, I remembered all of the times that I stared out of my dorm's window. My second dorm. It was high enough for me to see all of downtown. I always spotted on building that had blinking red lights. And I always wanted to be on the roof of that building. I don't know why, considering that I hate heights. But those lights blinked every night. And when the wind blew against the window, that was heaven. Definitely a feeling I'll never forget.

I think they want to wake me up at 8 or 9 tomorrow morning. Not gonna happen. I still have to pack, and I would much rather sleep than eat breakfast. Besides, my stomach is picky when it comes to breakfast.

Now that I'm thinking about it, I'll probably come back early anyway. My nephew is going to be really upset once I leave. That kid is really attached to me. He'll say my name before he says "mama" or "dada." And when he doesn't see me, he looks for me.

Either way, I better get ready. And get some sleep.

Hours

I just reached my 20th hour of being awake.

I can't say that I aced my finals, but I can say that I gave it my best shot. And that's good enough for me. I have one more to go, then I head home for a few weeks.

I guess my plan is to rework my final paper and read the book again for the class. Memorize it all, absorb every letter of every word. That should do it.

But for now, I need sleep. I might have to wake up and finally turn my horn in. Depends on when the office is open.

Get It Over With

If I had my own Wikipedia page, what info would it contain?

The countdown begins. And I really don't want to take any tests. I'd much rather take part in an interview to determine my grade. And I really hate dealing with people. That tells you how much I don't want to take a test.




Anna Benson. This picture was shown on ESPN's Pardon The Interruption. Kornheiser asked, "If she was stuck in your chimney, how happy would you be?" Very.

I hate baseball. But if I could get tail like that for sitting on a bench and throwing a ball every five games, I would.

Alright. I have to sleep. From what all of my profs said, taking a test on minimal sleep is not the best idea. And I get the two hardest finals tomorrow. Spanish and EE.

One Day

I can finally relax, even if it's only for a day.

I have two finals on Friday and one on Saturday. I'm actually going to study so I can ace these tests. OK, I probably won't get a perfect score. But I'm at least going to put forth more effort than usual.

The weather is finally starting to be normal. When I was sitting outside, it rained a bit and the wind was fairly cold. Real nice. I think it's supposed to snow in Dallas on Saturday. Too bad I won't get in until Sunday.

I really want to spend time with people during this break. I also want to sleep 10 hours a night. I'm not sure which one is not going to happen.

Eh, I'm tired. I'm out.

Do It

I just spent 4 hours doing a lab. And I'm only 75% done. I can't finish it until I get to campus tomorrow. I also have a lesson in the afternoon, so I don't know if I want to wake up early and try to get my lab in, or just go to my lab after the lesson and press my luck. Eh, I usually have good luck, so why not? Besides, I want extra sleep tonight.

There's something I want to talk about, and that thing is premarital sex. If you don't want to read it, I suggest you visit your second favorite blog. And I just know someone is bound to disagree...

The reason why some are told that premarital sex is wrong is because once you get married, and you're a virgin, you don't know what you're missing. Therefore, you're not curious to find other fish and see if the water is better elsewhere.

But while many suggest that marriage is about love and trust, there's a third ingredient that few will not accept. If neither the husband nor the wife has a satisfying sex life, then all is not right. Sex is important. A little SAT sample: Marriage is to engine as sex is to lubricant. (Yea, I did that on purpose.)

Nearly all of my friends have had premarital sex. And I don't fault any of them. I can't.

My dad told me something, and this shows how cool he really is. When I was 11 or 12, he said, "Son, as far as sex goes, if a woman offers herself, it's difficult to say no. I would understand." He didn't tell me that premarital sex is wrong, even though our religion is strict about it. He told me that temptations are everywhere, and no one can refuse them all. And it wouldn't make me evil or a bad person to do things before marriage. (Yes, with all of the attention I was getting from females, he had to inform me at a younger age. It was in my best interest. Seriously, if you ever see pictures of me from that era, you would be in awe of how cute I was. Was...)

My dad is so cool. And all of my friends think so too. Now that I think about it, he did a really great job as a father. I think I'll build him a new computer while I'm home.

In conclusion, there's nothing wrong with getting a sample before you tie the knot.

And now I'm going to sleep for a while. Maybe I'll dream about something controversial and write it down for you.

To You

The red and green decorations have been up for nearly a month. Malls are filled with kids and parents looking for that special something. Couples find new and exciting ways to keep each other warm. Real warm.

And now the dilemma begins.

I first felt guilty back in kindergarten. It was St. Valentine's Day, and we all had paper sacks for the valentines that were given. I would receive a bag full, but I had not given any out. I don't celebrate Valentine's Day. This was a confusing time for me. Should I accept these valentines? Should I reject their thoughtfulness? What do I do?

I concluded that rejection is painful, so smile and give thanks.

This went on for many years, until Valentine's Day was reserved for couples only. And when I didn't receive any valentines, I felt relieved. There was no decision to make.

What does this have to do with Christmas? Well, like Valentine's Day, I don't celebrate Christmas.

I never had to face this problem when I was in school because we never had school on Christmas Day. I didn't think about it at all. Even when teachers decided to show Christmas movies during class, I would inform the teacher of my beliefs and accept the option to sit in the hallway. While other kids colored pictures of Santa, I drew my own pictures. While other kids gazed at the brightly-lit tree, I looked out of the window. And I never once held a grudge against anyone. I never wanted to interrupt their time to be happy.

I haven't been to church for many years now. But I still have my faith. This year, I'm really put to the test.

I have my family, and I have my handful of friends. The only group I'm thinking about is my collection of friends. No one in my family celebrates Christmas. So, I only focus on friends I trust. Friends I would do anything for.

I want to get presents for my friends. Not necessarily Christmas presents, but just gifts. Something to let them know that I do think about them. I do care.

At the same time, I believe that it would be wrong of me to accept a gift during this time of the year.

I like giving. I like watching someone's face light up when they hold what they've always wanted. I like making people happy.

While I'm at it, I should also mention that I'm single, I like cooking, and I like shopping.

Almost Done

So great. "Indecent rubbing." Check it out.

And for those of you with iPods, this could be real fun. At night. And alone.

I'm just happy to be home. Spending so much time on campus sucked out all of my energy. I can't explain how I'm still awake.

It was warmer today, but that doesn't mean it was warm. A nice jacket was necessary, but some people went overboard. There are some fashion trends I just don't understand. But then again, I don't really care. As long as I look good, I'm happy.

I didn't realize that a nice clean shave draws many looks from the opposite sex. Nice.

But I do know that a fresh haircut always lures the ladies. Nothing was funnier than when I would get a haircut, go to church (once upon a time), and just get stares. The good kind of stares. But yea, I would never hook up with any of them. Not my type.

Oh, the dreams have been haunting lately. No nightmares or anything like that. I just see people from my past that I wish would disappear from my memory. I don't want to think about the past anymore.

And now I'm going to sign onto AIM and go to sleep. Yea!

Ice Cold

What an interesting morning!

I did the usual stuff, like wake up, brush my teeth, etc. But when I got out of the shower and checked UT's site, I lost all motivation to continue my routine.

At 9:02AM, UT decided to close the campus for the day.

(It's not even that cold. The wind chill is only at 11 degrees. Oh, and the suck part of cold weather in Texas? Pizza delivery chains decide that driving pizzas to a customer is wrong. I understand that it's strictly for the safety of the driver, but I'm willing to pay a better tip if it gets to my door. Risk versus reward. Come on now.)

So, I have no idea how I'm going to finish my unit tests, and I don't know what to do about the paper that was due today. I figure the prof will send an email soon or something.

But what I really hate is that temperatures are going to rise soon. The high for today is supposed to be 38, but tomorrow the high is 50. This means that I'm going to have two tests tomorrow, no matter what. Oh, one more day off would be so nice.

And while I would like to go outside and enjoy the wind, I should probably study all day.

Cooler Than Cool

Well, the university shut down because it's cold. What a bunch of chickens. Then again, no class is always nice.

I was in the middle of a unit test when they announced it. Everyone had to leave. It sucked.

I'm going to spend all of today working on my paper. I'm writing about blogs. I have to give a history of newsgroups, explain what blogs are and what they represent. What are the benefits and weaknesses of blogs? How are they used?

Oh, it's so cold here. But a little colder would be nice. I think it's 38 degrees or so outside, with a mixture of light rain and sleet. And that wind really kills the ears.

I was tempted to go outside and shoot the ball around. If I can feel comfortable in this weather, I should feel comfortable in any weather. And I could do the same workout from Rocky.

Alright, I need to start typing.

Vulnerable

I really, really need a vacation.

Yes, I know that this semester is almost over. Still, I'm worried about whether or not I'll have my sanity at the beginning of next year.

I enjoy some of my classes. I hate the others. Almost half and half.

It really sucks because I know I'm going to do something great one day. I still have all of the motivation necessary to do so. I don't mean to toot my own horn (beep, beep) but the talent is there. All the qualities I need, I have. But it takes small steps. And I'm too impatient.

It doesn't help any when you can't imagine what you'll be doing five years from now. I can't even imagine what I'm going to do next week. I'm screwed.

Alright, I'm done complaining. I don't feel better, but tomorrow is another day.

Sleep Is Good

Ugh, what a long weekend. I know, I said 'ugh.'

I'm finally heading to sleep. I've been studying for a unit test tomorrow. I want to complete as many as possible in the next four days. I'm really going to give it the ol' college try.

Nothing new to speak of this night. But I will divulge more information tomorrow.

FBombAndy, signing out for tonight.

Images To Dreams

If I had to die, I wouldn't want it to be in this room. I would want clouds, and a blue sky, and maybe a girl in a bikini. I mean, come on, someone is going to die and all they get are bare walls? Yes, I have too much sympathy.

Eh, today was alright. I was really off during my French Horn lessons. Oh well, better to get it out of the way. CS 349 was alright. Nobody was in a talking mood, so the prof had to tell random stories. They were funny though.

Alright, I'm going to take a unit test tomorrow morning. Hopefully I can get it done on the first try. I need to speed things up, otherwise I'll be taking tests on Saturday. No, wait. There's a ton of college football on Saturday. Well, there goes that idea.

Erik and I are going to Best Buy and Toys "R" Us. I'll probably get a toy for my nephew. He likes basketball, so I might get him a small basketball goal. Something like this.

Alright, I'm all sleepy-eyed. I'm out.