Up Again

Just another sleepless night. Nothing different, most everything is the same.

I figure I'll pass out soon though. I'm tired, but I don't want to go to sleep. Sounds a bit like my 3-year old nephew. He never wants to go to bed. No matter what rewards you promise him, it isn't enough.

But I'm nearly 20 years older than him. In fact, it really freaks me out that I'll be 23 in less than a month. I had plans laid out for myself, and I'm not reaching my milestones. At the same time, I think that my long-term goals have changed. The things I like to do have changed. There are many different routes I can take, and I trust my decision-making ability.

I would say that if you've hung out with me, you know that I make the right decision 99% of the time. And it's not always the obvious. The very rare times that I make a bad decision are usually the result of a lack of sleep, medication side effects, or just plain absent confusion.

However, I think that if you've ever communicated with me, whether face-to-face or not, you know that I do the right thing. So far, I can only think of one thing that I regret, and even that isn't 100%. I still would have done the same thing, only different. I would change some slight details. So, it isn't that big of a deal. Some people gather regret like its stock is going to shoot straight up.

Currently, I am faced with making another decision. Well, a few, but I'm thinking extremely short-term right now. If I had to assess the risk-reward ratio, I would say it's a low-risk, low-reward kind of thing. I like to gamble, so it's not much of a choice.

And I choose to sleep on it. Just for tonight.

Not A Bad Song

"You know why
They called and just let it ring
No reply
The door is open I swear
Ain't no use in picking up
You know why

[chorus:]
It's all my head I know
So they tell me so
Until my head explodes
Into my head it goes

Tastes so good
Oh, but I knew it would
Tastes so good
Burn like a match house
Medicate just to make you soft
Love is blind

Catch and release me
What the hell were they thinking of
You know why

[repeat chorus]"

- I Think I Lost My Headache by Queens of the Stone Age

You're my headache.

Typical Night

5:10 AM. Start.

Ok, it doesn't start at 5:10AM. It's much closer to 1:30AM now. [adult swim] repeats everything it aired from 10PM on. Futurama first, Family Guy second. After that, I really don't care. (Although I'm getting into Bleach right now. It's alright.)

So, after watch the same show twice in one night, the clock says 2:30AM. I laid on my bed for a few minutes and covered my eyes. I felt tired, but then I didn't. I sat back up, and started going through my usual bookmarks. MySpace, Facebook, Netvibes, Pownce, Digg, and then I just start going through Wiki. I'll start with today's date, find an event or significant birth, and then click link after link.

This might get me to 4AM. But it's just a possibility. At this time, all of the good channels air infomercials. So, I go back to my bookmarks. Maybe I'll leave out Wiki this time though.

I go through those boring social sites again, and I've probably killed 30 more minutes. If I'm lucky. It's 4:30AM. The idea of going to bed starts to cross my mind. I brush my teeth and change into some shorts.

I start to look at my blogs, and figure out where my next step is. As an example, I thought about posting a long essay on why I'm fascinated with rap songs about violence. Rappers go on about putting people in graves, capping fellow rappers, and wanting to fight. How can this possibly be good for that "culture?" And during this show, which airs on a public broadcast channel, the hosts are smoking things other than cigarettes, making gang signs at the camera, and speaking with the grammar of a 2-year old. Oh, and there's a picture of Martin Luther King Jr. on a wall behind them. It's the foundation of a generation of hypocrites.

Then I thought about posting about a story I found on ABCNews.com. Apparently, two teenagers were arrested for patting girls on the butt during school. The boys mentioned that it had become the secret hand shake, and one of the "victims" confirmed it.

Teenagers are overfilled with hormones. They are going to do things that are very inappropriate. It is nothing new. Yes, these boys were doing something inappropriate. But they should not have been handcuffed and detained in a juvenile jail. A brief trip to the principal's office should have been more than enough. When I was in 6th grade, I remember two girls standing behind me in line and grabbing my ass. Not patting, but grabbing. You know what I did? Nothing. Didn't bother me.

Some parents shelter their kids, and this can be a very dangerous thing. I'm not saying that we should all run around patting asses. But the kid who never hears a bad word, doesn't date until he or she is 18, and is never in a confrontation is going to be extremely shocked once they are free.

I remember hearing bad words since I was 3. I was "fooling around" with girls before I got into middle school. In 4th grade, if a kid yelled at me, I intimidated him by not backing down. Even with all this, I'm not a bad person. I'm college educated, with no criminal record, and no drug addictions. I hold the door open for women and the elderly. I give everyone a chance, and almost everyone a second chance.

And now, it's 6AM. My eyes aren't tired. But if I don't go to sleep soon, I'm going to make it worse. Tomorrow, I may not fall asleep until 7AM. The day after, 8AM. And that is the only reason I'm forcing myself to lay down.

Something New

I just posted a MySpace bulletin about this, but I'm really starting to get bored with MySpace (and Facebook.) Actually, I've been bored with it for a few months now.

Either way, just mentioning that I have a few invites for Pownce.

File sharing, messaging, and a few other things. Totally free, and the downloadable software is optional. There aren't very many people on it, since it's invite-only. That means you don't get friend requests from hookers and such.

The first people to request an invite get one.

What to do?

It has been a long, long time since I have picked up a bible. So, I don't remember much of what's written.

If I remember correctly, gambling is condemned by the Bible. I could be slightly wrong, or totally wrong about this.

So, if a devout Christian wins the World Series of Poker Main Event, isn't it ironic?

Is it even worse that I'm praying he loses?

Just Typin'

These past few weeks in Dallas were fun.

But, they were also my last. If I go back, it will be for a day, or maybe a weekend. But other than that, it's done.

I still have a few connections to Dallas. There are a few people that live there, and these are people I'd visit with. But I'm talking about only a few people. Maybe a handful. Umm...how about 4? Possibly 3?

I mention this because I changed my phone number. I do not 'represent' the '214' anymore. And this is the first of many steps in determining where I live for the long-term. I'm fine with Austin. I could live here for quite a while. I'm starting to appreciate some of its better qualities.

I got back in time to play in the poker tournament. Didn't do so well. 4th out of 14. I played fairly well for the first 2 hours. But I ran into the one type of player that can screw over the best of professionals - the amateur. The person that calls any raise, just so they can see one more card. They want to play every hand, no matter what cards they have. I hate it. It's the first time I've left a competition with an empty feeling. Coming into it, I really wanted to play my best, win, and say to myself, "OK. Now I'm ready." I don't think I'm ready yet. If I go, there are going to be amateurs there. If I can't beat them, then what's the point? I just have to get better.

Either way, the night was still fun. The chic that hosts all of the poker nights is transferring. So, this past night was spent with drinks, stories, and what-not. Honestly, I only knew these people through these poker tournaments. However, I actually felt like they were real friends. They were very open with me, and everything just went smooth. It's because of this that I stayed even after I was eliminated. Besides, I always help out with the cleaning afterwards.

So after everything was locked up, we all stood around outside. Our hostess had some parting words, and things were kinda emotional for her. She gave peoples hugs and what-not. It was a bit awkward for me, because she really let loose on my shoulder. At the same time, I felt like I was doing what I'm best at. I provide comfort, no matter who. I'm always another person's shoulder.

They decided to go to a bar down the street. I really didn't want to go. I don't drink, and I don't like loud places. Besides, I didn't have my phone or anything. So I went home.

When I got home, everyone was already asleep. It was still before midnight. I don't sleep until 4 or 5AM. So, I changed clothes, grabbed my phone, and went to the bar.

I'm not very social. I get nervous very easily. And I tend to just sit in the background. So, this was a good step towards getting out, lookin' around, and feeling comfortable in new environments.

It was a small bar with a stage for karoake and stuff that I wouldn't do. Well, I would play pool, but I'm not that good. I saw the group right away. We sat around, talked a bit, and people danced. After an hour, it was time for peoples to leave, so I left as well.

Still felt empty though.

Poker Stats

Better.

Hopefully it's all done. Seems like a bad reaction to some medicine I've been taking for migraines. There's other reasons, but I'll leave that unwritten. Of course, now I have a migraine. And it's not one of those "oh, my head hurts" kind of migraines. For me, it always involves sensitivity to light, sound, and a bit of nausea.

Either way, I just wanted to put down some stats from my recent poker session.

112 hands played.
37% won.
87% of showdowns won.

67% of flops seens.
52% are wins when I see the flop.

I did 2 sit-ins, which involve 10 people. I finished 2nd on the first table, and then 1st on the second table. Both times, it came down to me and the same player. It was a very friendly heads-up, mostly because we played the same way. I don't bluff very often, and I slow-play almost any hand I get. I raise pre-flop when I have a great hand, and I bet mostly on the river. I check-raise most of the time. And if we're going to show hands, I have you beat. Well, at least 87% of the time.

Real Sick

Here's a list of what I ate today:

1 Roll of Ritz Crackers.

And that's it. Something really wiped me out today. Low body temperatures followed by sweats and shakes. Toss in some dry heaving and the inability to do simple tasks. This stuck with me from the time I woke up to around 9PM. I didn't eat a single thing until 7PM or so. All I drank was water and Powerade Option.

It looks like the 22nd of this month is moving day. Well, that's when the moving process is finalized. We plan on loading the moving truck during that weekend and going to Austin as soon as it's all done. I should be back in time for my apartment complex's poker tournament. I'm going to take this one very seriously and fine-tune my game. I tend to be a little bit too friendly, and that leads to bad calls and bad bluffs.

It could be so much worse.

"Make something, make someone
Beg on a knee, baby baby please
Pout your bottom lip
While cracking the whip
You know what we want,
It's candy to cum to"

Queens of the Stone Age - Sick, Sick, Sick

Return of the Lyrics

Thinking can be very unhealthy.

I'm glad that my parents are moving out of here soon. Everytime I'm here, things from the past start to haunt me. Things, and people. Whenever I leave the house, I always double-check how I look. If I run into anyone, I don't want to be wearing one of my old shirts, and unshaved. It's not the best look for me. At the same time, I don't want to run into anyone. The idea of running into an ex...well, I don't even want to think about it.

I don't talk to anyone here. None of the exes, I mean. (I'm sure I've typed that before on here.) However, I do keep up with the "local news." 2 of them are married now. 1 of them has a kid. That really freaks me out. I still think of myself as being young. To think that other people my age are doing this really weirds me out.

It also weirds me out because I could have been stuck in that position. If I had let myself be sucked into the way of life around here, there is a strong chance that I would have been married by now. This small, podunk town has a way of connecting two people and forcing them to believe that most of the world doesn't exist. You only get so many chances to leave and make something of yourself.

Of the people I knew from when I lived here, most of them still live here. Sure, they have jobs, but they don't have a real career. They hang out with the same people. They go to the same places. Nothing has really changed about them.

It reinforces my choice to get out of here. I don't want to run with the same crowd. I want something new as often as possible. I get bored easily with routine events, common places, and even people. It's like a person who does something dangerous just for the adrenaline rush. After a while, it doesn't give you the same rush. So you find a taller cliff, a faster river, or a better airplane.

That's not really a good trait to have, is it? Always looking for the next thing. Never happy with what's in front of you.

Oh well.

"Don't you want to go into the hollow?
I won't go it alone.
Aren't you gonna follow?"

Queens of the Stone Age - Into The Hollow

Cycle Out

Sometimes, I forget the important things.

Everything I do is part of a cycle. And I just realized that my current mood means I have come around full-circle. I'm right back where I started. The mystery is in figuring out just how long it has been.

I'm bored and frustrated. I'm stressed out. I can't do anything about it right now. Well, I can change the boredom issue. That's about the only thing I can change. My frustration stems from not being about to really start my life. There are still some steps I have to take. For instance, I need to find a job. And that's where my stress comes from. I'm trying to plan out the next 5 years, but I can't do it because I don't have enough information. I can't plan even 1 year ahead because I have no clue about the next month.

So, there's just a couple of things I can focus on to distract me. Right now, I'm helping my parents with their move to Austin. The living room is already full of boxes. And there's still plenty left to pack. However, my mom frustrates me with her sentimentality. I want to throw away 80% of the things I pick up, and she wants to keep 80% of everything. I believe that if it can be replaced, it can be throw away. The less junk we pack, the less work we do.

I picked out my next project. I've always wanted to write a book. Well, I don't think I can work with all of my blog posts, even if they date back to August of 2003. Much of what I wrote were just repeated ramblings. So I've decided to create characters, situations, and such. I've planned out all of the necessary details, and a basic structure of the story. I know who is going where, and where point A, point B, and point C are. I just have to work on my vocabulary and relating it to today's average person. (My sister encouraged me to write a book. Among my brother, her, and myself, she's the smartest and most realistic. So, if she gives advice, it's best to listen.)

I guess that's why I feel the same as 5 years ago. At that time, I was packing my stuff and preparing for college. My parents were sentimental in keeping all of my stuff that I didn't want anymore. I was bored for most of the summer. I didn't really hang out much with my friends.

But when I compare 2002 - 2007 to 1997 - 2002, well, it's really no comparison. People always say that high school sucks, it was full of awkwardness, and everything was a popularity contest. But it's so much easier to fit in when you see the same people 5 times a week. People make an effort to at least say something to the kid sitting in the corner. If you don't offend anybody, you get a good reputation. If you are nice to the right person, people like you. I didn't feel awkward. I wasn't the most popular, but I'd say a majority of the students knew who I was.

In college, I wasn't even friends with my first roommate. And all of the friends I eventually made were because I saw them more than 4 times a week. It might have been because the class met that many times, or it was through a large group project. But, for each of my "MWF" classes, no one came up to me. But that's the price to pay when you choose a public school like UT-Austin. This really is the generation of the self-centered and egotistical. If you don't have a RAZR, or a video iPod, no one is coming up to you. (I will never get a Motorola RAZR. They are everywhere. I'm not saying that all people who have one just want to be "in." I'm just saying that I don't want to be like everyone else. I do have an iPod though.)

But, here's hoping that the next 5 years are better.

Decisions, Decisions...

I still get that one feeling.

I like to keep my options open because I never know when some celebrity is going to realize, "Hey, this FBombAndy guy is amazing. I've got to get with him." And in the meantime, I like to keep a list prepared for which famous women I want the most.

I was watching the National Heads-Up Poker Championship on one of those HD channels. It was the semifinals, and some chic was taking on Paul Wasicka. I just saw the last name 'Elizabeth.' I couldn't figure it out, so I just kept watching. Right before the commercial, they called her 'Shannon.'

Yes, that Shannon Elizabeth.

I went to Wikipedia just to double-check.

I think she's at the top of my list. She's a bit older than me, but I don't care. Age isn't that important to me. (OK, Jennifer Tilly, another poker pro, is 48. That is just a bit too old for me. She still looks good and all, but that's old enough to be one of my parents. Not cool.) Shannon Elizabeth is 33, and from Texas. That's my 'in' right there. And 33 isn't too bad. It's just 10 years. (Closer to 11.)

Next on the list would be Hayden Panettiere, but she's not 18 yet. She's off-limits.

I was flipping through the HBOs this afternoon, and I saw Amanda Bynes. She's cute enough. I guess she can fill that spot for right now.

I don't have a No. 3 right now. If Kate Beckinsale weren't married, she'd be here.

OK, I'll go with Rachel Specter from those RGX Bodyspray commercials. Absolutely hot. Don't know if she counts as a celebrity yet.

Maybe I should have people text message their vote in. Or call a special number. Then I can tally up the count and present the results tomorrow night at 8PM Central Time. (I really don't watch the show. Generic people should not be allowed to vote for generic music.)

Katherine Heigl. (I don't like Grey's Anatomy. I like The Ringer.) Jennifer Love-Hewitt. Eliza Dushku. Elisha Cuthbert. Lacey Chabert. Natalie Portman.

OK, I made up my mind.

Shannon Elizabeth.
Lacey Chabert.
Rachel Specter.
Amanda Bynes (Placeholder for Hayden Panettiere.)
Katherine Heigl.
Natalie Portman.
Elisha Cuthbert.
Eliza Dushku.
Jennifer Love-Hewitt.

I need a 10th.

Rachel McAdams.

The Next Day

It's just a tough thing to handle.

This weekend had its ups and downs. The days that were planned out and supposed to be full of fun turned out to be rather boring. The days that had no plans became the most fun.

My sister came in on Wednesday afternoon. I went with her to help find the hotel she was staying at. The managers mentioned that they would have free chicken in a few minutes, so we stuck around for that. Turned out to be Chick-fil-a. Real good stuff. My parents came in later that night.

My sister took me to Target on Thursday to help me find some stuff. One of the things she told me about was Tylenol's new sleep aid. My graduation ceremony on Saturday was at 8AM, and I usually don't fall asleep until 4AM. If I don't get enough sleep, my stomach feels like it's on fire for the day. Pat was at the apartment when we got back, and we tried to figure out what to eat. I already forgot what it was. Might have been Sonic.

I hung out with my sister again on Friday. We had plenty of catching up to do, and it had been 5 years since I last saw her. Erik came by and delivered some unfortunate news. That's not really material for here though. Well, we tried to figure out the best way to prepare for Saturday morning, and we decided that I should get my graduation clothes together and I should sleep over at Erik's since he lives 2 miles away from the Frank Erwin center. Might be less than 2 miles. I tried out the sleeping aid pills, and they somewhat worked. I felt tired, and I slept well. Woke up at 6AM without a problem.

The ceremony was alright. I knew 3 other people there, and we were all worried about having to go to the bathroom during a speech. We spent 50 minutes standing around before lining up and getting out there. Someone came by our section and asked, "Who wants to be first?" I quickly raised my hand, and I was the first to represent the CS grads. I was hoping that right after saying my name, I could just keep walking out of the building. Nope. Doors were locked.

There was one nice thing about sitting in the second row and walking early. I got to see every chic with a nice view. They were covered in gown, but there was enough leg to determine whether or not they had a nice body. That passed about 25 minutes. The speakers really sucked, so that was the highlight.

After all the names and what-not, we walked out. Met up with the family and quickly hurried back to the apartment. I really didn't want to linger around outside.

We all went back to the media room at my apartment. Projector, tables, nice chairs, and a small kitchen. After eating and watching a movie, my aunts and cousins left to walk around downtown. My sister and bro-in-law went also. That left my parents, my bro, sis-in-law, Pat, and Erik. We played some Guitar Hero, and then some Texas Hold 'Em. (I won, of course.) Time came to clean up, and we took care of everything to leave.

Went to Japon with my sis, bro-in-law, and Erik. It's a nice sushi place. Had some talks about recent events in the family. Just some casual conversation.

Most everyone left on Sunday. The only ones that stayed were Pat and my sister. We still had plenty of fun, and I got to try out a new recipe. Sunday night was quiet, but still kind of fun.

Pat left Monday afternoon. I went shopping with my sister after he left. She really wanted to get my some curtains because my window sucks. It's always 10 degrees warmer in my room. Always. We came back and ordered some food. Then we all sat down to watch the season finale of Heroes. After that, my sister had to go back to the hotel to get sleep. Her flight was early in the morning, and she was going to go straight from the hotel. We said our byes, and all that was left was my bro and the kids. (My sis-in-law had to work that night.)

When the kids went to bed, and my bro called it a night, it really hit me. I had been surrounded by people all weekend long, and had spent plenty of time with my sister. But I was now alone in my room and everything was quiet. It was the first time in a really long time that I felt alone. It was midnight, and nothing was happening. Everyone was gone. (But I really missed my sister. We are too much alike. We see the same things, and we thinks nearly the same. It was nice to have someone to talk to like that again.)

Still, I know my parents will be moving here soon. My dad starts working here at the end of the month, and all that's left is to get rid of stuff at my old house. Everything might be finished by the end of June. After that, I think I'm going to take that vacation.

Sweet

The Super Bowl in 2011 will be in Dallas!

I'm listening to 1310AM The Ticket based in the DFW area, and they just caught wind that it will be officially announced in minutes.

This will all take place in Jerry Jones' new $1 billion stadium.

Roger Goodell is at the podium.

Sorting It Out

Just another reason why I'm different.

I'm counting down the days to the graduation ceremony. But I don't get happier with each day passing. I just want to get it over with. Seems a bit contradictory, I know.

I'm ready to be out of there. I want out. But I don't want to go through the formalities. I just want to wake up next Saturday with nothing on my schedule. I don't want to walk anywhere, and I don't want to wake up early. It's one day, but it's one day where the spotlight is on me.

Well, maybe not the entire day. It might just be the first few hours of that day. With family in town, everyone should focus on the kids after long enough. After two hours of ceremony, the plan is to head to the apartment's media room and celebrate. There's some really nice AV equipment in there. You know, a projector, surround sound, and the like. We'll watch a movie, listen to some music, etc. After an hour or two, the family will focus on each other. So I'll be able to sneak away and go sleep.

My parents have been bugging me about what I'm going to do. They're moving down here to Austin so they can be closer to the grandchildren. My dad will work and my mom will be the full-time babysitter. My sis-in-law will keep her job, and my bro might go back to grad school.

The older I get, the less attached I become. The past 5 years away from home have been filled with many revelations about myself. I can go days without speaking to anyone, and I'm overwhelmed when there are too many people, or too much sound. I'm destined for a quiet life where I do exactly what I want and nothing else.

The plan is still to stick out the current lease on the apartment, use that time to gain financial stability, and then find a nice place to live. It might be here in Austin. It could be in Dallas. It could be somewhere out of state.

It's a bit depressing to know that there is a strong possibility that I only have one year left in Austin where I am close to my immediate family. But I also understand that I'm not that 5-year old kid on his first day of school. I'm not that 13-year old kid who is about to start high school.

I looked up to my bro when I was younger. He has always been near. I played French Horn, just like him. I was the drum major my senior year, just like him. But I'm becoming more like my sister. More mature than her age, and distant. I barely have any memories of her. But before I started school, everyone said that we were alike. When I turned 8, she lived 200 miles away. She got married when I was 10. She moved thousands of miles away when I was 12. Since then, I've seen her 5, maybe 6 times, in 10 years.

I think my parents know it too. My dad asked me months ago if I was going to leave, just like my sister did. My mom seems hesitant to ask about what my plans are. And every time they hug me, it feels like they don't want to let go, because I might disappear.

All I can think is, "Wait. I can stay in Austin. I don't have to leave."

But I also think that it's impossible for me to be great if I stay. I don't think I'll accomplish anything if I always have that safety net. Even if I get my own place on the other side of town, nothing good can come out of it. If I go out with them every time, I'll never have independence. If I never go out with them, they will make me feel guilty by saying that I've abandoned them. If I visit once a week, they will expect more, simply because I won't be that far away.

It's not even happening, but it already frustrates me. It wears me out.

Who's That Girl?

Just so everyone knows, I will not be talking about sports any time soon.

It's Sunday, so we did the usual thing. Certain peoples always come over when it's "buffet day" at DoubleDave's. Starts at 5pm, and we just have to be the first ones there, even though everyone here knows I like my dinner at dinner time. 5pm is too early for dinner. If you like to go to bed at 8pm, that's fine. But I don't live in a nursing home. I don't go to bed before the good shows start.

Either way, I went with them because I had not eaten all day long. (I woke up at 2pm today. I made up for the lack of sleep on Friday night. So this buffet was my breakfast.) I had my variety of pizza, and we all just sat around.

There's this new girl that works there now. She came in with the second shift. I've seen her before and all, but sometimes she wears a cap and I can't get a good look at her. From what I can tell, she's cute. Very energetic, in a playful way. You know, playing air guitar to the song playing and hopping up and down.

Back to the point. My bro mentioned, "Hey, why don't you get with that girl?" I just kind of nodded my head and mumbled. That was my poker face.

I think I am going to get that girl's number. Cute, playful, an inch or two shorter than me. I'm good with that. (I don't mean to sound overconfident or anything. I know what I bring to the table. I'll be a college grad soon, with a degree in a highly-demanded field, and I'm all about self-sacrifice.)

(But don't ask me about looks. I'm very self-conscious about my appearance. Now, that doesn't mean that I think I'm hideous. On a scale of 1 to 10, I'm comfortable saying I'm between a 7 and an 8. I could be wrong, as I've been told that I'm attractive. Ok, let's move on...)

The main obstacle right now, in my opinion, is the fact that I'm going to have a van-load of family down here in Austin. It's graduation time, and aunts and cousins are on the way in less than 2 weeks. I do not (do not) want to have a woman when they get here. When people ask me, "So, who's the lucky woman?" I can truthfully tell them to mind their own.

Ah, but once they are all gone, I'm free to do whatever I want. One girl, three girls, it's all up to me. So mark it down on your calendar. May 21st seems like a good day to change 'teh' MySpace's "relationship status."

Sleep On Through

For the past week or so, I haven't been able to stay asleep. I usually wake up at 3AM or so. But there's never a reason why. The only noise in my room is the sound of my desktop running and iTunes. My playlist for sleeping only has music that is relaxing and calm.

You know how if you hear something around you while you're asleep, you can hear it in your dreams? Well, last night I woke up because I heard the smoke alarm. I practically sat up in bed and figured out what I need to do if the hallway is on fire. But 1 second later, and I realize that the smoke alarm is not going off. I must have dreamt that sound.

So then I try to remember my dream and figure out all of the details. I was in a large auditorium and there was a professor lecturing. Fire alarms at UT sound completely different than smoke alarms. Even so, everything was fine and there was no emergency in my dream. I wasn't even paying attention to the professor. I remember walking out of the room and wandering the hallways. Saw a couple of my friends and what-not. It was just a normal dream.

Oh well. I'm sure whatever it is will go away soon. I'm not stressed out, and I'm not anxious. I feel very relaxed. It must be something deep and hidden.

Another Round of Frustration

Everyone says I'm quiet. If only they could have heard me tonight...

I talk softly. I want to be loud enough so I'm understood, but not so loud that I'm overpowering the listener. I want to make sure that people know who is talking. I don't want people to wonder who is whispering. I try to find the balance in everything I do.

One of the things I learned in marching band is that yelling loud and yelling with projection are two different things. If you want that short, sudden burst of sound, aim for being loud. If you want someone to hear you clearly a mile away, you have to project your voice. That means you push from your stomach, up through your throat, and out of your mouth.

Sometimes I think I'm going to make the TV break when I "project" my voice at it.

I watched the Mavs lose a critical Game 4 tonight. I could see every mistake in their gameplan, and I knew what to do in order to fix it. But I'm in Austin. The best I can do is yell things like, "Come on!" I punched the couch many times, slammed my fists on the ground, and fought with air.

I'm not really a superstitious person. But I do think that keeping things the same leads to the same result most of the time. So I've tried to figure out what is different now. What am I doing now that I wasn't doing last year, when they got to the Finals?

I played basketball for the first time in a year last weekend. 10 days ago.

I said that I was semi-retired from basketball. At that time, I didn't want to play because the last time was filled with things that I don't really want to talk about. Needless to say, there was a lack of good, clean fun in the last basketball game. I'll leave it at that. But, 10 days ago my parents came down and decided that we should all go to the park. I just put on my jeans and a shirt, because I really didn't want to go. It was a family thing that involved being outside. That's not my kind of thing.

Either way, my bro and my dad played ball for a while. Afterwards, they went on a walk with my nephew. I decided to grab the ball and shoot around, just to see if I still have "it." After 10 minutes or so, this guy came up and wanted to shoot around too. I'm a nice guy, so I agreed. He mentioned that when he usually comes to the park, there's a game going on and he jumps in. I mentioned that my bro and my dad would probably like to get a game going, but I would sit out if that would happen. A bit later, they showed up and I suggested the idea. Remember, I'm in jeans and a shirt with nice, non-basketball shoes.

They talked me into it, and we played 21. I torched them at the start, but then I got tired. I think my bro won that game. Then they decided that there was enough daylight left for one more game. I caught my second wind, and decided to keep playing. I won that game.

If I remember correctly, Miles Davis took a long time off from playing trumpet so he could reset his lips. When he came back, he was better than ever because his new lip placement gave him a better sound and range. I work in the same way. Any talent that I have gets better when I don't do it for a while. One year away from basketball reset my form when I'm doing layups. It reset my form when I'm shooting from long-range. And I was better for it. They were surprised at the new moves I had, and even thought that I had been secretly going to campus to play ball for the past year. (That's not the case though. I shot around once, but nothing more than that.)

So, I now believe that the reason the Mavs suck now is because I started playing basketball again. It's silly, I know. But that's the only thing different from last year.

And the reason I can't sleep is because I'm so frustrated with the Mavs. I'll lay in bed and toss and turn. Ideas will go through my head, my brain will process each detail, and I'll never stop thinking long enough to fall asleep. It sucks.

Just Not Enough

Today just sucked.

I couldn't really sleep last night, so this morning was nothing but pain. Well, it wasn't that bad. I felt fine on the bus ride and afterwards. But that's probably because I always have music on, and that distracts me better than anything.

Class was ok, but I'm starting to dread finals week and what-not. I really want to do well, and I just want everything to be over with. I'm tired of school. I made bad decisions, and I think it's time I do what I want. Even if it's only for a month, or even a week, I need to do the things I think are worthy of exploring.

I got home around 5PM and laid on the couch for a bit. My nephew was doing something or other, so I reached to grab him. I must have twisted my body awkwardly, because the next thing I know, my neck feels like it got hit by a hammer. I took some Tylenol and just waited for the effects. Nothing.

At 6PM, I headed over to the main office to get ready for my poker tournament. I had to set everything up since I know what goes where, who gets how many chips, and so on. Wasn't a problem though. 18 people showed up. Eh, it might have been 17. Well, I was at a table with 2nd place from the last tournament, and 2nd and 4th place from the tournament before that one. Some new guy joined our table, and I think he was sandbagging. He needed the rules to be explained to him, and he made comments after each time he won, and it was just annoying. The other guys at my table were all just turning their heads and trying to keep cool. Well, I said out loud, "I guess it's game time." The guy probably had 3000 chips to my 1500. In 2 hands, he was down to 2000, and I was up to 2500. The 3rd hand was just amazing.

I had A-6. On the flop was something like 6-3-6. I raised to 300, he re-raised to 600, and I said, "Well, I'm pushing you all-in then." He called, and he had K-6. A J on the turn, followed by an A on the river gave me the full house and his chips.

At this point, there were only 2 people at my table, so we split to the other tables. I then proceeded to take down 3 guys at the new table, and we formed the final table. Only 5 people made it, and that's usually how it goes. (By whipping these people, I had nearly 15000 chips. For reference, there were 28900 chips in play total.)

In hindsight, this is where I made my most important mistake. I had Q-J. I called to see the flop, which was A-Q-10. The guy next to me bet 1000, I pushed all-in. He called, and he had an A. I needed a Q, K, J, or 9-8 running to win. A face card would have put me in the best position. But his A held up, and I lost plenty. I held my ground until it was just him and me.

Much like last time, we agreed that we just go all-in each time, and whomever won twice in a row would be the winner. He eventually won. No prize for 2nd place though.

Overall, I know I was the best player there. For the first 3 hours, I was unstoppable. I've never had a run like that. But, when it comes down to flipping a coin, I just didn't win. Whatever. Everyone there recognized me when I first walked in, and halfway through, everyone knew I was serious. (In fact, 2 of the guys that went out at my first table stuck around to watch. One of them was patting me on the back and the other was helping me get over a bad hand.)

Am I ready to play for real? I doubt it. There are still things I can learn, and playing with nothing on the line isn't the same. I'm pretty good when I play online, but I'm so much better when I can see my opponent. I really think that if I were to get a sponser, I think I would at least cash out in a major tournament. I don't care if I have to wear some polo with a brand on it. I just want a chance.

I just have to keep getting better. I'm young, and I have potential.

Like I Said...

I don't celebrate birthdays. But I will acknowledge it the day after. (Don't ask me for my reasoning behind "one day later." It just makes me feel right.)

Jae's birthday was yesterday. Well, at least in the central time zone. It's still the 15th on the west coast. But, I live in Austin, so that's what I'm running with. Either way, it's never a bad day to mention how glad I am to have met her.

Almost all of my friends are older than me. I might be 22, but my age does not define me. While other people my age are going to frat parties, drinking for fun, and finding a new relationship every week, I prefer to go to a nice restaurant, learn a new skill, and enjoy being single. All of my experiences with people near my age have been disappointing. With the exceptions of Brandon, C.T., Sam, and a few of my fellow band members, I was completely let down with the immaturity of some people. I am not saying that my group would have fun drinking a bottle of fine wine and playing Trivial Pursuit. Far from it. I know that one of my friends has a fascination with showing his backside to people. But we could have an intelligent conversation without any other outside influences. All of us have ambition to be respectable people in society.

Brandon, C.T., and Sam are all older than me, but not by much. Still, we are far more mature than our ages. Other friends of mine, such as Erik and Pat, are 5 to 9 years older than me. I just prefer to hang out with older people.

Jae isn't old or anything. As far as maturiy goes, she is at the level that I prefer most in a friend. We have shared intelligent conversations, but I didn't feel like I needed to write perfectly. Maybe we don't talk everyday, but the connection is still there. So many similarities, but so far away. You know how some people say they are "on the same wavelength?" That's how I describe it.

A while back, I had a contest to see who knew me the best. Jae won, and I made her a video of "Trippin' On A Hole In A Paper Heart" from Guitar Hero 2. She also gave me the option of doing "No One Knows." So, to complete both of her requests, here is "No One Knows."

Born Around...

As mentioned a dozen times, I don't celebrate birthdays. I've never had a birthday party, and I've never been to a birthday party.

Yesterday was my brother's birthday. He turned 31. I didn't say a word, even though my dad wanted me to call him an 'old man' or something.

Didn't do anything special. We played Guitar Hero 2 and he took lead guitar. I really don't mind playing rhythm or bass. By the which, you can find all of my current videos on Youtube. Some are dedications, and some are just for fun.

Trying To Win

Just going through another weekend.

I played in another poker tournament. 4,000 people, and I sucked pretty bad in the first couple of hands. I went from 3,000 chips to 350 in 10 hands. I assumed that it just wasn't my day, so I went all-in blindly. I lucked out, had A-J, and someone called. I doubled up to around 700. I still figured that this wouldn't be enough for me last long enough, so I went all-in again. This time, I had A-K, and 3 people called. My hand held and I went up to nearly 3,000. That's definitely something to work with, so I played my normal game again.

I made it past the 2nd hour, and I was up to 30,000 chips. At the time, 75,000 was the chip average. I was doing well, but not well enough. I think I went all-in with K-Q. 2 people called, and they had me beat. 1 person had A-K, and another had A-Q. The only way I could win the pot is if I got a straight with A-J-10. Very unlikely.

I finished 79th. That's not terrible. The buy in was 30, and I won 190. Still play money though. I will never gamble with real money online. While poker is a game of cards, chance, and skill, it takes a greater understanding of the game to play in a real setting. I am much better at reading an opponent when I can see their face and their hands. Maybe they have a twitch when they bluff. I can see that if they're sitting right in front of me. If you're playing online, you can't even tell if the punk kid across the ocean is smiling.

Still, after May 19th, I want to go play in a real tournament. Next Tuesday, I have another tournament here at the apartment complex. If I have a strong showing, I'll be determined to find a good location. If I suck, I'll keep practicing and wait for my next opportunity.

Ideally, I want to find a small tournament where 1st prize is a seat at the WSOP Main Event. I'll gladly wear a polo with a company's logo if it means I get a free seat in that tournament.

Very, Very Interesting

Sooooo...

I've been doing some thinking. Hayden Panettiere, the girl from Heroes, has something going on. I know Kevin Pereira (from AOTS) jokes about her being legal soon. I decided to check on 'teh' IMDB to see exactly when. (Here in Texas, 17 is legal, but I'm not like that. 18 is fine.)

The day after I turn 23, she becomes legal. Not a bad deal, even if it is a 5 year difference.

But what started this whole thing is this website I go to. It's What Would Tyler Durden Do? It is absolutely hilarious, and every now and then I get to laugh at Teri Hatcher. I just got home from school, and I did my daily routine. (That consists of MySpace, Facebook, email, WWTDD, Digg, ESPN, and YouTube.) Today, the first picture up there is this:















Back in January, I saw a different picture:




















A famous, blonde, italian girl is awesome. But a famous, blonde, italian girl who loves to lick is as perfect as possible.

Where I'm At...

Just a few things to mention.

For two days, we had highs below 50 degrees. It was the best thing for me. There was some heavy rain on Saturday, but it was just windy and wet on Sunday. We actually had some sleet also. It's days like that which make me wish I lived up north. Every spring, I think about the upcoming summer and how I'm going to try to survive it this time. And each spring, I wish I could just move away.

The way things look, my parents will probably be moving here to Austin within the next few months. They are going to help take care of the grandkids and what-not. After much thinking, I've decided on the following:

I am going to look for a job here in Austin.
After one year, I'm going to re-evaluate my situation.
If I'm not happy, I'm moving. Probably out of state.

On to the next topic.

Brandon just had his birthday nearly 2 weeks ago. There are 2 more birthdays coming up this weekend. But we'll cross that bridge when we get there.

Last year, I talked about how I met Brandon, and some of the crazy things we did. All I did this year was give a shout.

But there's a reason he's #1 on 'teh' MySpace. He's ahead of at least 3 people who have known me since middle school. And it's simple really. If I have a problem, there's usually only one person I can call up and know that everything I say will be kept between us. There are things that Brandon knows but no one in my immediate family knows. I talk to Brandon at least once a week, and he never does anything to piss me off. If I got married tomorrow, he'd be the first person I would ask to be my best man. I know he would do a great job organizing all of the things that go on, and I could trust him with the ring.

And the only way I'm coming out of basketball retirement is if Brandon comes to Austin. I haven't played basketball in nearly a year.

Either way, those are the facts. And speaking of 'teh' MySpace, it's getting very boring. Some people are going to be moving up to top 4. And I'm probably going to change it from Top 12 to Top 8. Honestly, I'm 4 steps away from just shutting it down.

Alright, time for bed.

Good? Bad?

I have to give this week a mixed review.

I got all of my surveys back for my research project. Now I have to go through each and score them, transfer them to a spreadsheet, and get some solid information for the beginning of my paper. It shouldn't be that hard, and I'll probably get started in a little bit. Some of the results are interesting.

I have some metal shelves in my room. I accidentally bumped into them this afternoon. About 2 hours later, I started to feel the bruise. Right now, it's 7 hours later. I cannot believe a bruise could hurt this much. It's right below my right hip, and it's deep. It feels like I got hit by a hammer. I can just slide my hand across the area and tense up. Guess it's time for some ice.

I just took my second operating systems exam. Very frustrating.

But some things this week weren't so bad. I finally got my monthly haircut. At the barber shop, they were watching a DVD of '300.' I didn't ask how, since I pretty much knew the answer. And I'm not saying where, because I don't want any trouble for them. It was awesome though. This is the same barber shop that has Playboy for reading. Real nice place.

I finally found a new group that I'm really interested in. Silversun Pickups. Real good music. I've listened to the entire CD, and everything is 3 stars or higher. Very solid material.

I'm sure there's more. But for right now, I'm just going to put on my headphones and lay around.

Oh, and a quick shout to Brandon. His birthday was last week.

If Only...

If you move to Austin...

...I will show you around town. I know where the perfect views of a sunset are. I know the best places to have a picnic.

...I will invite you over just to hang out. I'll have a nice place with movies, games, music, anything you want.

...I will take you shopping. I'll provide my opinion if you ask for it. And when you're not looking, I'll buy you the outfit you liked the most.

...I will be motivated to be the best person I can possibly be. I will make sure I'm the best example for everyone to follow.

...I will TIVO your favorite shows if you can't watch them, and I will watch them with you.

...I will cook you dinner before every Dallas Mavericks game. If they play in the afternoon, then it will be lunch.

...I will buy two plane tickets and fly us to Dallas for a Cowboys game.

And when you least expect it...

...I will give you a hug that lasts longer than usual.

...I will grab your hand.

...I will buy you tulips. (Your favorite.)

...I will tell you all of my secrets.

...I will sing you songs.

...I will prove myself to you.

But until then, I just have to keep going forward. It's not a certainty, and it might not be likely. But the mere chance of it being real gives me enough reason to have hope. I can be content with hope.

Dreams and Reality

I guess the two were related this time.

Two nights ago, I had a dream about the future. It is kind of sci-fi, but it's not totally unbelievable.

The sky was a transition from orange to purple as the sun went down. It looked like a summer night, but it felt like an autumn evening. Everyone seemed to be in a hurry. I had no idea why.

While the sky seemed very futuristic, the place and time felt like 6 years ago. My mom was driving me to school and we had to stop by a nearby convenience store. I started to look for something to drink, but everything seemed to be $5 more than the usual price. This had me confused for just a little bit, as a small bottle of water now cost around $7. I don't know if I grabbed anything or not, but I remember going back to the car.

I knew we were going to my school, so it weirded me out when we went to where my mom works instead. She said she was doing a short shift, and to just wait. Well, I'm not the type to wait, so I started to walk around outside. That's when everything got really weird.

At one point in the sky, there was a small trace of blue. That blue then spread out into a huge circle that covered half of the sky. I saw a spaceship come through and released a small object. Turns out it was a rocket, and it took out the land to the left and right of me. All that was left was a small island that had the building my mom was in and myself. I looked over the edge and it was at least a 1/2 mile drop down to the ground that was left. Besides the grass on my island, there was nothing but a barren wasteland.

I wasn't scared. I was just angry. And I decided to fight back.

But that's when my alarm went off and everything ended.

As far as reality goes, I just looked at all of the stuff I'm going to need for graduation. I looked at invitations, gowns, and such. I made a quick list of people I would send an invitation to, and that list came out to around 21 people. 13 of those consisted of family.

And still, if it were up to me, I would be at home during my ceremony. I don't want to go, but it's another excuse for the entire family to meet up.

Too Smart For Their Own Good

Harvard club promotes abstinence

Harvard student Rebecca Singh said she was offended by a valentine the group sent to the dormitory mailboxes of all freshmen. It read: "Why wait? Because you're worth it."

"I think they thought that we might not be `ruined' yet," Singh said. "It's a symptom of that culture we have that values a woman on her purity. It's a relic."

So, they should have said, "You couldn't wait, but we still love you." Or, "Sorry you're a whore."

(I'm not saying that women who have premarital sex are whores. I don't find anything wrong with it.)

I love making fun of people who are offended by the smallest things. So you were called a virgin, big deal. Get over it. How do you get the word "ruined" out of their message?

It just shows that Harvard students have their own set of problems. Sure, the university doesn't discourage sex, but it's not making the decision for the students. They may be smart, bright, or whatever, but book-smart people are usually lacking in street-smarts. These kids may have been ridiculed in high school about being geeks who are virgins. Then they get to college, and they want to get past all of that. They throw out their pocket protector and grab a rocket protector. (I know, that was bad.)

The "purity" of a woman may be a relic. Celebrities flash their sexual parts more often today than last year. And I won't expect any woman I date to be a virgin. I don't make assumptions.

But there's something more satisfying about having a virgin say, "I'm yours." It's much better than having a woman who has had dozens of partners say, "Whip it out." It's not about "purity." It's about dedication.

Percentages

This may be a bit nerdy, but whatever...

A few days ago, I was looking at the NBA standings. I found one thing interesting.

The Lakers at 35 - 32 were behind the Nuggets, who were 34 - 31. This gives them a 0.5224 and 0.5230 winning percentage, respectively. So, the Lakers have one more win and one more loss, but were behind the Nuggets.

Then, I looked at the Warriors and the Clippers. At the time, the Warriors were 32 - 36, while the Clippers were at 31 - 35. This gave them a 0.4706 and 0.4697 winning percentage, respectively. The Warriors had one more win and one more loss, and were ahead of the Clippers.

I now understand why the situation changes for each case. In the first case, both teams were above a 0.5000 winning percentage. Therefore, a loss hurts more than the amount of help a win gives. In the second case, both teams were below a 0.5000 winning percentage. In that case, a win helps more than the amount a loss hurts.

Either way, I just want the Clippers to get the 8th seed, and the Nuggets to get the 7th seed. According to my schedule analysis, the Warriors will not make the playoffs. I have yet to check on the Nuggets, but just based on what I've seen, I do expect them to get the 6th seed. That's too bad, because I think the Nuggets would have a better than slim chance of knocking Phoenix out of the playoffs.

Also, I appreciate the assists statistic. I am a guy that likes to pass the ball and see a made shot. However, a 40-point game is better than a 20-point, 10-assist game. Well, only if the person didn't need 40 shots to get 40 points. If it's an efficient 40 points, it's something special.

Waiting For Tomorrow

Something tells me that today isn't going to be my day.

I woke up at 4:38AM this morning. I couldn't fall back asleep, so I tried something new. I forced myself to get up and get ready for school. Took a shower and did all of that stuff, and came back to my room. Surfed around for a bit before I forced myself to lay down again. I got another 40 minutes of sleep. My alarm went off and I did my usual breakfast routine.

Apparently today is National Cut The Grass Day or something. Everywhere outside, grass is getting cut. (For those of you enduring freezing temperatures or close to it, I envy you. Now, I know you're saying, "Oh yea? Let's trade places." To that I say, "Please, let's.")

Tons of people on the bus today. I sat towards the front, and it was uncomfortable. Couldn't listen to my music without freaking out. Terrible bus ride.

We also made it to campus late. Very unfortunate because I needed to stop by the campus store to pick up water and what-not. This puts me 10 minutes behind my usual routine, and if you know me at all, I hate getting out of routine. So as I'm walking to class, in my mind I'm kicking rocks and dropping f-bombs. My fists are clenched and I just want to punch stuff. (Again, all in my mind.)

Out of nowhere, I see this chic. She sees me. And for an instant, I forget about everything. Kind of nice.

But 10 seconds later, I realize that would have been a perfect spot to say "hi." At that point, anything else that would have went wrong wouldn't have been really significant. So hearing something like, "I have a boyfriend" would just be thrown onto the pile and I'd keep walking. So I'm back to punching the air and other violent acts. (All in my head.)

I make it to my class, and I forgot my take-home quiz at, well, guess where. Home! Now I'm in class and just trying to figure out how to get out of this funk.

Oh, the prof just mentioned that we have a test in 9 days. Awesome. Remind me that the exam will be on context-free languages, both regular and irregular.

Keep Goin'

(I did the ol' copy-and-paste from 'teh' MySpace blog. I'll have fresh material sometime around the bend.)

As I've mentioned before, I'm always trying to test my limits. I want to know what I am good at, and what I should leave alone. So, there's nothing like a Texas Hold 'Em Tournament to start with.

I play through PartyPoker.net. No money involved, all fake chips and what-not. When you first register, you start off with $1000 in chips. You get to choose from Texas Hold 'Em, Omaha, 7-card stud, and hi-lo variations of the mentioned games. I hate the hi-lo games. A person with a terrible hand should never win anything. Competition produces two things: winners and losers.

Either way, I registered for a tournament at 6PM my time. Nothing on TV, so I could just waste away on my laptop. 4000 people is the maximum allowed in each tournament, and that's exactly how many showed up.

I always go with the flow. If people are hesitant, I just sit back and relax. I'm not going to sweat over hands with little impact. If I'm at a table with idiots going all-in pre-flop, I just let them fight it out until they're gone. If I know I can take them out, I do it.

An hour went by, and I really couldn't believe how many people went out. I think around 2000 had been knocked out. You don't win anything unless you make 400th or better, so there was still plenty left. I always hovered around the chip average. If I fell behind, I would just bluff hard and they would crumble. Gotta pick your spots carefully. Another hour went by, and I think we were down to 700 people left. 2 hours so far!

I played my game perfectly. People tried to bluff me out, but I would pick up on their tells easy. Maybe they checked after the flop, knowing that they didn't have a hand. I just took their money then. Knocked a few more guys out, and soon I was ranked.

Kept choosing my spots. Kept watching the rankings. Every few seconds, another short stack was being knocked out. I just had to pass the time until there were 30 or so people left.

That happened after the 3rd hour passed. 30 people, 3 tables. I was a bit below the average, but I was far from being the short stack. I watched them drop like flies, and I watched my pile of chips grow. After a 5 minute break, there were 12 people left. Once 10 people had made it, the final table was set up.

I felt content with this. (Before I started, I told peoples that all I wanted for tonight was to get to the final table. True story. I have witnesses.) It took 3-1/2 hours to get to the final table. A few hands went by, and I started to just get tired. I had already planned a trip to Wal-Mart (that was a whole different story that I won't discuss here.) I went all-in with pocket 4's when I probably shouldn't have. Didn't care. We both had 2 pairs, (Q's and 7's came out on the board,) but he had the better kicker, so I was out. Finished in 10th place. The buy-in to the tournament was 520 chips.10th place earned 13000 chips. 10th out of 4000 people. Not bad.

I still want to try this stuff for real. Playing online is fun and easy, but I'll have all of my tools available when I'm playing in the real world. For right now, I just need to focus on graduating, finding my dream job, and saving money for the World Series of Poker. Ideally, I'll get a job where I can set aside enough for the buy-in each year. Or at least enough to get the smaller tournaments under my belt to earn an automatic seat. Something like Harrah's in New Orleans in May. Yea...

Missing People

Sometimes, I miss people. Even if I haven't heard from them in a long, long time.

Anh is great. Don't know if she still reads this. But eh, I'm doing this to make it public.

I can't remember when the last time I talked to her was. (OK, I just did some history searching, and it looks like just a bit over a year.) She commented on this blog a few times, but not for even longer. The last time I had any communication, it was via SMS. One text message long ago.

Of all of the female friends I had in high school, I always felt like I had a different connection with her. Not in a "more than friends" way, but just that certain wavelength, or vibe. The type of connection where you know what the other person is going to say well in advance. You know their style, their type of humor, and what cheers them up. Whenever you hang out, nothing goes wrong. It was just one good time after another.

Whether you've seen my MySpace page, my Facebook profile, or anything at all that I've created, you probably know that my favorite show is Attack of the Show. Monday through Friday, 7PM Eastern, 4PM Pacific. The two hosts are Kevin Pereira and Olivia Munn.

Kevin Pereira has some Latin in him, even though it doesn't always look like it. Very quick-witted and dirty-minded. Almost the exact same as me. Olivia Munn is Asian, but was raised in Oklahoma. She is mostly innocent, except for when dirty-talk starts up. Almost exactly like Anh. (Anh wasn't raised in Oklahoma, but Texas is in the south also.)

Either way, here is a clip from Attack of the Show. I've chosen this particular clip because the interaction between Kevin and Olivia is very reminiscent of daily interaction I had with Anh.



One more person that makes me wish I would have stayed in Dallas. There are plenty of reasons, but I'll save those for another day.

Just Saying...

For some reason, I feel compelled to seek forgiveness.

I just went through the phone numbers I have on my cell phone. I treat numbers in a very different manner than most everyone else. If your number is on my phone, it means that if I am able, I will always answer your call. If your number is not in my cell phone, I will never answer your call. Your next best bet is to leave a voicemail that I may listen to in a month, or to send a text message.

I just went through the numbers. I deleted quite a few. All people I have no intention of speaking to again. I know that I will never try to contact those people again.

There were a few names that brought back memories. I must have forgotten those over the past few years. Some were women that I just stopped talking to. And they must have let go as well.

But what is weighing me down right now are just a few words. I feel terrible right now for all the girls that said to me, "I love you" and didn't hear it back. I can only imagine the type of heartbreak that causes. I can only imagine. I've never said "I love you" and didn't hear it back. But that's probably because I say those words sparingly.

As far as I can remember, there was only one time where I initiated the mention of love. It was the ASL sign for love, and it was for a girl I knew long ago. I didn't want to say it because I had never said it before.

Needless to say, it didn't work out. The love might have been mutual, but the timing was terrible. I'm fine with that.

But I want to apologize for all the times I didn't say "I love you" back. I was honest by not saying it, and I know that caused some emotional pain. I want to apologize to all the women that I've detached myself from. I want to apologize for any future calls you make that I don't answer. I have to keep moving forward.

I'm the type of person that disappears for years at a time. You may not hear from me, and you may forget. And if you forget, then it is all lost. It is almost a certainty that we will never cross paths again. I'm sorry that I came into your life only to leave abruptly without saying goodbye.

And I'm sorry if you were attached to me.

Up Late Again

Yeesh...

Legends of the Fall is on TNT right now. That movie is something else. So much misfortune, but so much strength. That's exactly what I'm talking about. I don't like these shows that have trivial problems that emotionally immature characters can't handle. It's about facing your problems and moving ahead.

There are two parts that I find particularly moving.

When Brad Pitt's character (Tristan) comes back from his 2nd vacation, and Anthony Hopkin's character (Colonel Ludlow) comes outside to meet him. The colonel has already had a stroke by this time, and is walking with a limp. He also has the right side of his face paralyzed. Because of the relationship I have with my dad, it just puts that idea of coming home to an old man in my head.

The other is at the end of the movie. When the narrator is talking about Tristan's last battle, they show an older man coming across a grizzly bear. Tristan has a knife, and the bear is huge. Of course the bear wins, but there's something to be said about that way out.

After messing around with 'teh MySpace,' I realized something. It's the new phrase for me. Nothing but the truth.

"Always bored..."

It makes me think that everything I'm doing right now is just to pass time. The real challenge is ahead. And I almost can't wait.

Bunch Of Morons

Fine, I won't use the word 'hate.'

People I have an intense dislike for:

• People who have conversations near doorways, in the middle of a hallway, during class, etc.
• People who always have that look on their face. The look that says, "Duh, what?"
  
• People who loudly tap their foot.
• Guys who say, "I got a girl pregnant" and sound proud.
• Professors who read off of slides. (Just a reminder.)
• Referees that don't let the game get into a flow.
• Pat Riley.
• Guys who stare at other guys.
• People who have their iPods way too loud. If I can hear it, and I'm 10ft away, it's too loud.
• Clowns.
• People who say, "Ahhh" after a drink. Seriously, you were THAT thirsty? And it was THAT refreshing?
• Chics that are constantly on the phone.

I guess that's all I can come up with for now. Just some minor statements...

A second round pick for Anthony Johnson. I really didn't like him, but I don't like that deal. Unless it's just the first step for something better. I keep refreshing, but nothing new yet.

Test in 39 minutes. Another test in 5 hours and 39 minutes. Awesome.

Mavs game at 8:30(?) and I can't wait. Too bad Dwyane Wade had to mess up his weak shoulder. I really wanted this game to be a beatdown with him playing.

Even when I'm done tonight, I'll still have plenty more to do. I get to keep working on a project, and I have 15 articles to read for my research project. Fun weekend ahead.

Many Little Things

One, Ghost Rider absolutely sucks. It's the worst movie I've seen in the past 5 years.

Two, nothing like a good shave to get some looks. From now on, I shave the night before each day I go to campus.

Three, I could look good with longer hair. Maybe no more fades from now on?

Four, I'm really enjoying my new "me" time. I go to the gym and just start working out. I feel a bit healthier, and that may factor into the looks I'm getting. Plus, I get to listen to my music and tune everything else out.

Five, I've never felt so...I don't want to say 'lonely.' When someone feels lonely, there might be some sadness or depression to go with it. I feel content. I know I'm not totally independent. But the only way I can describe it is that I do what I want, and I don't do anything I don't want to. I guess I really feel like an adult finally.

Six, graduation ceremonies should not be at 8AM. Too early.

Seven, there are so many non-issues being discussed, and it really beats me down. No matter what the issue, the solution is simple. Don't try to change me, and I won't try to change you. Religion, sexual orientation, whatever. It doesn't bother me. I'm very open-minded. If we keep everything to ourselves, things can run smoothly.

Eight, I love cold wind. It brings back so many memories, and it makes me feel alive.

Nine, I am very ready to start living. Working, building, investing, all of it. I know I'm going to do something great. I can't wait until I find out what it will be.

Ten, seriously? "Hi" is all it takes? Psh, I can do that.

Idiot

"At the end of the day," Wade said, "you're remembered for what you did at the end. ... I think that's the reason -- Dirk says they gave us the championship last year, but he's the reason they lost the championship, because he wasn't the leader that he's supposed to be in the closing moments. That's because of great defense by us, but also he wasn't assertive enough as a leader's supposed to be." - Miami Herald

This aboslutely pisses me off.

Dwyane Wade gets more phantom calls than anyone in the league. And sure, he drives to the basket plenty, which earns free throws. But he gets calls on jumpshots. He gets touch calls. He needs to know that without the refs in his pocket, he's just another shooting guard in the league.

Michael Jordan hit game winning shots. Dwyane Wade makes game winnnig free throws. There's a big difference. The league talks about letting players determine the outcome of the game. But there is not another player in the league that has an exception to this rule. You can't have it both ways. I've seen people get hit in the head on a last second shot without a foul being called. New Jersey complained about it loudly earlier this season. The refs need to ignore the score, and they need to ignore the time.

Miami didn't win that championship. Dallas gave it away. And it makes more sense that they were up 2 - 0. That's the only way you can give it away. You have to have 'it.'

Some ESPN analysts are finally acknowledging the benefit that Dwyane Wade gets. They concede the fact that he does go to the rim, and he should get free throws. But each game he gets between 1 and 3 phantom calls. That means 2 to 6 free throws.

In Game 6, Wade took 21 free throws. The refs were Dan Crawford, Steve Javie, and Eddie Rush. The first two are well known for being partial to one team.

In Game 5, Wade set the Finals record with 25 free throws. Those refs were Joe Crawford, Joe DeRosa, and Bennett Salvatore. Two of those refs are known for screwing the game over.

I'm not ok with Game 3 either. 18 free throws for Wade, fine. But what kills me is that he should have fouled out of that game. He tripped Devin Harris, and there wasn't a foul. It would have been his 6th, and the comeback never would have happened. Refs: Dan Crawford, Ken Mauer, and Jack Nies.

There was nothing controversial about Games 1 and 2. Game 3 sucked. I'll accept Game 4. Miami beat us, and it was clear. But Games 5 and 6 were skewed in Miami's favor.

Wade needs to shut his mouth and play basketball. Don't claim any type of greatness, because it's all on free throws. You'll probably never win another championship. Wait, there is no 'probably.' I am saying it right now.

Wade will never win another championship.

Feb. 22nd. That's when the Mavs play the Heat again. I'm expecting a beat down of epic proportions.

Now, on to ESPN. I'm tired of ESPN. Most every employee has some bias towards the East Coast. You get homers like Wilbon on PTI. Sportscenter carries non-stories. And they pick crap basketball games to air on Wednesday and Friday. Seriously, Cavs and Heat? #5 vs #8?

One game that isn't being aired is Dallas and Houston. #1 vs #5. I think that's a much bigger game, considering you're going to get quality basketball. Not this half-court, slower than molasses East Coast basketball.

Doing Stuff

Meh.

It's been a while. I have been trying to sort things out and get everything together. Most of my classes are going fine, but Operating Systems is killing me. I put in about 36 hours on the 1st project. I barely got something turned in today, and it's not really everything.

I'm not ready for a break or anything. I'm not tired yet. I just wish Operating Systems wasn't required.

I played in a Guitar Hero 2 contest on Saturday. Only 6 people showed up, but they were all good. We had to compete against each other on Expert. Because they couldn't put us into a bracket, they decided to make it double-elimination. I was in the first match, and I faced some guy on the song Hangar 18 by Megadeth. I won that match fairly easily. It's one of the songs I know pretty well. This isn't me playing, but here's a sample: Hangar 18.

Then I had to face off against the one guy I thought was the best. He played some songs before the tournament started, and I was impressed. Before they announced what song we were going to play, I told my brother that the one song I didn't want to see was Six by All That Remains. Sure enough, they chose Six. e beat me by 10,000 points, which isn't much. He only hit 1% more notes than me. So, that was my first loss. Not out, but I had to win the rest to get 1st.

My next match was against another guy who had only lost once. They didn't have a song for us, so we had to agree on one. We chose Beast and the Harlot by Avenged Sevenfold. I thought I would be ok, but I didn't know if he would be worse than me. It was pretty close for most of the song, but I broke free after the solo. I started to get every note, and he couldn't keep up. I think I won that one by 60,000 points. It was clear that I was going on to the next match

The kid that beat me at Six lost a match in that same round, so we had to face off again. Only one of us would move on. They called out Fall of Pangea by Valient Thorr. Not a hard song, but it is pretty long. We were even for most of the song, but at around the 4 minute mark, I started to pull away. He almost caught back up, but I killed at the ending. I think the kid was disappointed because he left right after that song.

I was in the final match after that win. I forget that kid's name, but he was alright. I mean, he was in the final match too. We were both kind of nervous about playing Jordan by Buckethead. For those of you who don't know, it is by far the hardest song EVER. Luckily, because we were playing against each other, we couldn't fail the song. High score wins, and the whole song is played. I don't know what the final score was, but it was by more than enough for him to say "wow."

Got 1st. And I got a shirt. It's black, so I'll never wear it. Oh well. Still nice to know that I'm the best in Northwest Austin.

I'm Mad

I hate Mike D'Antoni.

He puts his own players ahead of everyone else. He decides that his team "deserves" 3 all-star spots. You also give those 3 players tons of minutes to jack up their stats. One guy is a legit all-star, another is a guy with glass knees, and the other is a headless chicken without Steve Nash. Sorry, but last I checked, you didn't have the best record in the league.

Ever won the Western Conference Finals? Nope. Losers.

Dallas deserved a 2nd all-star. D'Antoni gave them the bird.

I hope they don't forget this. If they meet in the playoffs, I hope Avery holds a grudge.

I Hate Critics

Today was kind of boring. I had the apartment to myself. Went ahead and just watched tons of basketball. Our cable provider is giving us a free weekend of the NBA League Pass. That means that I got to watch classic games for a majority of the afternoon.

Went to see Smokin' Aces today. It was pretty good. I've seen bad reviews for it, but I have to disagree. Each character was given just enough to make them unique. The plot was laid out in the beginning, and then everything was just constantly moving forward. If you miss 4 minutes of that movie, you miss too much.

All of the actors and actresses did well. I was particularly impressed with Ryan Reynolds. Every movie that I've seen him in, it's always a comedy. And his humor is basically the same in each of those movies. Well, he really put it together for this movie. Very serious character, and he did a good job.

Movie critics are useless. They pick their favorite movies, and if something new doesn't crack their top 10 list, they crap all over it. Maybe the director uses a new technique. Doesn't matter. A critic hates it and the whole movie stinks.

The best way to rate a movie is to ask yourself 3 questions:

1. Do I want to see this opening night?
2. Do I want to wait for the DVD?
3. Do I want to see this movie?

If you answer any of those questions with a 'yes,' then you watch the movie. Let's say you see it a theater. Then you ask yourself, "Do I want to buy this DVD?" If you rent it or borrow it from a friend, then you ask yourself the same question. "Is this movie worth owning?" If you see it on HBO, Cinemax, or Showtime, then you ask again.

If you see it opening night, or close to it, and you want to own the movie, it was a good movie. Simple enough. For me, I saw Smokin' Aces on the second night it was out, and I want the special edition DVD that's going to be out in a few months. It was that good.

I'm tired of critics in general. Movie critics, music critics, they all suck.

Fun Decisions

Every semester, I treat myself by getting something I've been interested in for a while. Last semester, it was getting a laptop. The semester before that, I really don't remember. It might have been Guitar Hero. My first year in college, I got one computer and built another.

This semester, I'm kind of torn. I don't get to watch Mavericks games here in Austin. A SlingBox would solve that problem. I could be anywhere and watch my Mavs. On the other hand, I've had my eye on a new monitor. I found a nice 19-inch widescreen at a reasonable price. Not only is it a computer monitor, it is also a TV. Kind of nice.

Then there's the Nintendo Wii. That thing is hard to find. But for a next-gen system, it's pretty cheap. I have wireless internet here at my place, so it would integrate well with my existing electronics. Also from Nintendo is the DS. It's cheaper, but it is also hard to find. I may have found near my hometown, so my parents could get it on reserve for me. Another nice idea.

Then again, I don't need to treat myself. I have ideas, but sometimes that's fun enough.

I should just wait for Spring Break. I could fly somewhere and actually do something different. I've never used my Spring Break as a break. I always go home and do nothing.

Nothing like being nice though.

Kinda Bored

A friend of mine showed me craigslist. Of course I've known about it, but I never actually looked at it. He showed me a very funny post in which the person was making derogatory comments about someone who didn't spell correctly. The same person called it "retarted." Absolutely hilarious.

I'm not the type to go looking for love online. I'm not the type to post a personal in the newspaper either. And I have nothing against people who do.

But that doesn't mean I'm very successful with meeting new people in the real world. I'm shy almost all of the time. I never make the first move. I might make the first look, but that's about it. Even if there's eye-contact, I don't say a word. Besides, the females I'm interested in are the ones who make the first move. Get away from the norm.

Yet, I do find it easier to connect with someone I've never seen before. The only thing you are judging is their personality. If they are friendly and like the same things you do, then it really doesn't matter what they look like. You like that person for who they are. If you just so happen to live near each other, you might exchange phone numbers. If the conversations go well, you might just meet up.

This is what bothers me about 'teh internets.' Once, it was all about personality. Now, sites like craigslist and myspace inevitably lead to exchanging pictures. No matter what the intentions were, looks are an important factor now. Even if you read something like:

22 year old male. 5'8, slim build. Short brown hair and dark brown eyes. Can jog 3 miles without breaking a sweat. Loves to cook, and likes to shop.

Maybe I'm out of my mind, but I'm fairly certain a majority of females out there would raise an eyebrow and question the accuracy of the above statements. Can a guy like this really exist? And if so, is he going to look hideous? What better proof that this guy is desirable than to see a picture of him?

And this is why I won't do the online thing. It's practically a game show. Except that there are no commercials. There are no audiences. You exchange pictures, and one of you says, "Uhh, nope. No thank you." In a game show, if you're a contestant and you don't get picked, there will usually be a women in the audience who looks for you after the show. That's not how it works online.

There's another issue though. Meeting people online is very easy. You don't have to dress up or anything. Most of the time, you don't even have to type correctly. There are hundreds of thousands of people you can just randomly say "hi" to within your state at any given time. If you tried to walk outside and find someone at 3AM, you're more than likely to get into trouble. It's a completely different scene.

When my parents first got a computer and access to the internet, I was the one who spent a majority of the time on there. It felt very natural for me to set up an email account and find other people. I had some very unique experiences during that time. Today, roughly 8 or 9 years later, I don't keep in contact with anyone from that period.

But I really lucked out on blogger. I really did. I found two people, and I'm happy that I did. Yes, they live really, really far away from here. But I don't care. I'd still do just about anything they asked me to. On the MySpace, I've even put them ahead of other people I've known for over a decade.

I dunno. Just wanted to show some appreciation. They are special to me.

Dreaming Again

Amazing.

I haven't had anything interesting to talk about in the past couple of days. I've really been trying to get back into posting at a more regular pace. Was hoping that I could go every other day here, but things happen. I'm just going to have to try harder.

I started out with "Amazing" because I realized the obvious. I'm only in a creative mood if there's music playing. I was sitting here for an hour just trying to go through various topics. I said, "Screw it" and put on iTunes. It's been running for a while now, and finally I get my creative burst.

I had another awkward dream last night. It was awkward because I didn't know how to react to it. I'm still trying to figure out why I dream about the things I do. I never have nightmares. That's supposed to be a common thing, right? I don't mean every night. I just figure the average has to be around 3 a month or so. I have no clue. I haven't had a nightmare in quite a long time.

Every dream I have is about my reactions to situations. I don't reflect much on the dreams where I know it's only a dream and I abuse that knowledge by flying, punching, or whatever. I only think about the dreams where every action is based on instinct. So, most of the time, I can wake up and analyze my dream. This can lead to feeling content, happy, or just indifferent. Sometimes, I just feel awkward.

I want to believe that dreams tell us what we want. Personally, I've never dreamt about a person I've never met or seen. I've never dreamt about a place I've never been to or heard of. So, all of my dreams have to involve things I am familiar with. The things that I value the most should be the easiest for my brain to access, so it would make sense for my dreams to be about the things I value most.

When I dream about a situation, I figure it's just experimentation. Given some extreme circumstances, how would I react? Again, I am not surprised by my reaction most of the time. The times I am surprised, that's when I feel awkward.

I don't know. Maybe I should focus less on the surroundings and more on the general theme. Every dream has a theme. And every dream has specific elements to it. It's just a matter of how deep you're willing to dig.

Late Night

Fun stuff.

I love Guitar Hero. It has to be the most innovative game of the past 5 years. Well, I finally finished one of my goals for Guitar Hero 2. I completed "Free Bird" on expert with a 5-star rating. I wanted to make sure it wasn't a fluke, so I tried to do it again. Success. I don't have 5 stars on every song yet, but my mental block is definitely gone.

No classes today. It's supposed to get worse. Unfortunately, Thursday is looking fine. It's going to warm up enough to melt any ice and if there's any precipitation, it's only going to be rain. My favorite kind of weather. Well, I like it dry also, but I take the cold any way I can get it.

I'm waking up before noon again on my days off. It's really weird. But I've also figured out why I like staying up late. If I'm around the same people for more than 8 hours, I go crazy. Also, because everyone else is asleep, I can actually hear myself think. There are no children yelling, no adults talking loudly, and anything I hear is because I want to hear it. That could be music, a tv show, or nothing at all.

I just looked at the calendar and realized that it's mid-January. One more month before things go crazy. I really don't like Valentine's Day. People put too much effort into one day when they could spread it over an entire year. Such a give up.

Well, there's one thing I like about Valentine's Day. I really like those candy hearts. I think I'm the only one, because everyone else I know says that they taste like chalk. They must be eating the bad ones.

Cold Rain

This is going to be awkward.

I am an uncle. I don't call my nephew by his name. I call him "The Kid." It's easy and I can't forget it. You know, when I'm talking to one of my parents, I can just say something like, "You won't believe what The Kid did today!"

Later today, my niece is going to be born. I know that it will be today because that's what I was told. Reason enough. Well, this means that I will no longer be able to refer to my nephew as "The Kid." I have to come up with something new. I may just go with "The Boy." That's easy too.

Still hoping that the university closes on Tuesday. There's a 50% chance of sleet in the morning. I think that's more than enough for the administration to become cowards. All of the rallies and events that were planned to honor Martin Luther King Jr. have been postponed. I just need 24 more hours of freezing weather.

Just as a precaution, I'm going to try to adjust my sleep schedule right now. I won't be able to handle a full day without proper rest. As a result, I'm going to have to alter my blogging schedule. I will still try my best to keep writing here every other day. It's just not going to be past 3AM. Oh, and the nice thing about my schedule is that I only have to go to bed early on Monday and Wednesday nights.

Just counting down until graduation. Still wish I didn't have to go through the ceremony. Oh well. After 5 years, what's 2 hours more?

Almost There

Ahh, yes. The greatness of having two different places to write.

I've been alternating between this blog and my MySpace blog. There's a reason I'm using both, but I wouldn't know how to explain my system of determining which topics go where. But, the one thing I can explain is that fewer people in my hometown read this.

I'm very anxious to go back to Austin. I've been home for one week longer than I had planned, and I'm ready to get back to my normal setting. That's not to say that I'm tired of being here. I just want to get back to school and finish things up.

Whenever I go home, I tend to stay indoors and away from public places. There are just people I don't want to see. Besides, if I want to see you, you'll know that I'm in town. I'll let you know somehow, and I'll set aside a day or two just for you. Luckily for me, there's less than a handful of people I'll tell, so that leaves plenty of time to do nothing.

My last full day here consisted of sleeping until 2PM, watching my usual shows, going to Best Buy, then to Sports City Cafe, and then back to Best Buy. I played a Guitar Hero 2 demo while there and showed some people how it's done. There's nothing I love more than hearing morons talk about "Oh, I'm going to do this song on hard. That's right, hard!" Psh, whatever. Get over yourself. Here, I'll help.

Either way, there's still one thing missing from my MySpace profile. That would be a picture of myself. The problem is that I don't like pictures, so there aren't very many in existence. I don't like pictures from phones, so that's out as well. I want to make sure it's something classy, not just a party shot from a bathroom. There are way too many of those on the internets.

The reason I'm looking into this is because I've met some of my MySpace friends through the internets. They have no idea what I look like on a bad day or a good day. And there are two such people that I owe it to. I've known Jae and Jamie for over 2 years.

Eh, I'm just thinking.

Last Registration

I'm supposed to register in 4.5 hours. Woo-hoo.

The way it looks, I'll just have class on Tuesday and Thursday. Something like 9:30 to 3:00. That also includes 1.5 hours for lunch. Not bad at all. But that's if I get my undergrad research class. I like writing, and I don't mind learning about new topics. The only thing is that I have to find a professor who is willing to advise my research. I've been trying to think of various topics that I'm interested in.

I wouldn't mind looking further into security issues that are present in today's technology. I'm also curious about how students with no prior programming experience visualize the course material in computer science classes.

I recently took a course titled Information Assurance and Security. In this class, we learned about different forms of attacks that hackers can use. We also analyzed communication methods and protocols. I did read a bit of the assigned book, and I was fascinated by some of the topics we discussed in class. This is why I wouldn't mind doing further research in this area.

But, I'm also curious about visualized programming. I didn't start programming until I arrived at UT. We were forced to learn assembly for a special processor the professor created. Over the next courses, we learned about C and C++. These programming languages allow the coder to write very specific instructions. You can manipulate the address of data and individual bits with ease. So, when I started to code in C++, I didn't see boxes or anything like that. I saw one task and divided it into smaller tasks. Then I divided those again into even smaller tasks. Eventually, I had one line for each operation.

With Java, you focus on the object and adapt it to your needs. If you need something to represent a container of water, it's one attribute. If you also need it to know the temperature, that's one more attribute. So, when I have to code something in Java, I see the object in my head. I see a shape, labels, and compartments.

So, if you jump into some course similar to an intro class, what do you see that helps you? Do you draw it out? Do you create a flow chart? And if you look at someone else's code, how do you interpret it?

Kind of nerdy, I know.

But it is the last time I have to register. Makes me happy.

Gadget Gadget Gadget

I really want that new iPhone.

Really cool specs. I'm very impressed with the battery life considering that it has a bunch of small things constantly going on.

The only thing that sucks is the price tag. About $500 with the two year plan. From what I understand, it won't be available until June. Seems like a nice graduation present.

Engadget.com has more news about other less significant items.

Return of the King?

Wow, it's been long enough.

If you look at the last three posts, there's something funny about each one.

First, let's start with my rant about the Mavericks. I was completely upset to see them lose to San Antonio. I mean, maybe you've heard me mention how much I hate San Antonio, but that still doesn't give you a good idea of just how much hate there is. Well, since that post, the Mavericks have gone 28 and 7. Not bad. That also includes to wins against the Spuuuuhhhhrrrrrsssss in their own arena.

Second, I wrote a post about stupid football coaches. Since that post, I've seen the Longhorns lose two games and go to the Alamo bowl. Of course, they won and all. Still, that was a disappointing season. Also concerning dumb coaching moves, Bill Parcells sucks. The one thing that has beaten him all season long is the deep ball. They aren't even thinking of defending the pass. So, we get two costly defensive holding penalties. A stop would have been nice. By the way, Roy Williams has to be the most frustrating player in the league. You can watch him get beat by a tight end on one play, and then watch him intercept a pass on the next.

Oh, and I know hindsight is 20/20, but Bledsoe should have been holding the ball. Veteran playoff experience. That's all you need to know.

Third, well, there's nothing funny about the post with Jessica Biel. That's one nice posterior.